Colbert Me

I love Stephen. He has replaced virtually everyone on my Celebrity Exception List. (You know, that list of five celebrities you could mess-around-with with full spousal blessing in the one-in-twenty-billion event that you met said celebrity, charmed them, and convinced them not to not call the cops on you.) I used to have John Travolta on there-- until I found out he probably bats for the other team. I mean, there's nothing wrong with being gay, but why would I waste one of my five super-long-shot, once in a lifetime, Oh-My-Gosh-Could-This-Really-Be-Happening-to-Me spots on someone who'd rather be with Andy Dick? Likewise, for similar rationale, I have struck from my list Shepard Smith and Anderson Cooper. (The latter still saddens me. He'll never be my boo.) And, although internet searches show that he's is merely metrosexual, popular decree on this blog dictates that I lump Sanjay Gupta into a similar category.

So my new list looks like this:

1.) Harrison Ford TOO OLD?! John Travolta MAYBE GAY Stephen Colbert
2.) Shepard Smith PROBABLY GAY? Stephen Colbert
3.) Anderson Cooper AMBIGUOUSLY A-SEXUAL? Stephen Colbert
4.) Sanjay Gupta Not gay but too pretty? Stephen Colbert
5.) Tina Fey (Hey, I get confused sometimes, too) Stephen Colbert

Does anyone know where he hangs out on Saturday afternoons, say around 2:30?

Anyhow, it's his rapier wit that gets me. And the haircut.




AP piece on Colbert here.

Good Colbert quote from the above article:

"I am not a passive verb," he says. "This is first person, present tense, at all times. I am a verb. As Buckminster Fuller said, 'I seem to be a verb.' The show is present tense, present active. We're not passive, we don't observe. We set the news agenda. We create the news. We throw the pebble of the show into reality and we report on our own ripples."

I'm a ripple, Stephen. Colbert me.