I Heart Gi

Remember, Patriots fans: It is not (or no longer) acceptable to hate Gi because she is beautiful. She's with Tom, and he's with us. So by the transitive property, she's with us:

a=b; b=c; therefore a=c
Q.E.D.

It seems the gals at the Inside Track finally got the memo. Here is a complimentary article: "Tom and Gi and Baby Makes Three."

"The supermodel is holding the binky-sucking baby - quite expertly we might add - as Bridget’s nanny waits behind the wheel to take John home to mommy."

Now that I've gotten over my butt-hair-face-envy and adopted Gi as my BFF, do you suppose she'd tell me where she got that bra? She's looking especially perky in this picture, isn't she? The Gillian O'Malley ones I get at Target-- the elastic seems to throw in the towel within the first 20 minutes. Do you suppose SuperNonTiringElastic made from super-springy rubber harvested from sustainable rainforests in Australiasia is the "secret" in Victoria's Secret? (Is this the big blog-scoop I've been waiting for?)


Photos from Boston Herald Inside Track column, they credit flynetonline.com

Hey! Only I'm allowed to Pick on Tom!!

Now I'm mad. Click here.
(But read comments first.)

For some reason it won't let me link directly (dagnabbit), so you'll have to scroll down and choose the video about Tom entitled "Gosh, he's exciting." Warning: TMZ starts playing a list of videos as soon as you land on their site, while you're scrolling and looking for Tom Brady. Some of them are R rated and fuzzed out, so use caution.

Back in my day, we had no grotto at Philippe. We had casks of MSG behind the Jade Fountain. And we were grateful

I've been remiss in my blogging this week and didn't fill you in on an IMPORTANT story:

Brady and the Fembot caught on tape doing the nasty in a restaurant: Tommy Boy and Bunchabones were out in NYC at Chinese restaurant "Phillippe" (??!! Which is right next to Goldstein's Mexican Cantina?) and apparently they slipped off to the private wine cellar for some monkey love. And there's a camera in there, and well... The busboys have now seen ALL of Brady's moves.
This story perplexed me greatly. Don't they have access to expensively decorated apartments and glitzy hotels? They've gotta go to a restaurant to get it on? Then I realized: they're underwear models (yup, him too, he's taking it off for Calvin Klein), and everyone knows that underwear models CAN'T EAT. It's like that movie The Truth About Cats and Dogs, where Uma Thurman's character confesses that she likes to order in restaurants but she doesn't actually eat. They're like that. Imagine. What if they're like secret, repressed foodies, reading the menu, salivating, yearning for the Velvet Spring Rolls and Jade Dumplings...mmm. You know you want some. Here -- wait. Do what I'm doing. Open up another window and put Philippe's website music on in the background. (Click here.) Did you do it? All set? You're back? Are you comfy? Okay.. Mmmm... That Vegetarian Flat Noodle looks like it would be good. Okay. Maybe flat noodle isn't exciting. I'm just getting warmed up. Stay with me. Ooooooooooh. Mr. Cheng's Handmade Noodles in a Veal Bean Sauce. Mmmmm. That's what I'M talkin' about. Mmmm. I just love me some Bok Choi. Let's do it baby. Let's have some Drunken Sea Bass, I'll try your Crispy Duck, you try my Oyster Sauce, and we'll finish it up with a little Three Within. See what I'm sayin' baby? What I want isn't on the menu. Chef Chow's cream sauce may be famous, and... yum! It really is velvety! Wow. Did you try that?! Oh, you gotta, it's so good! No... wait. Ahem. Let me swallow, and wipe that off. Okay. Here we go: But it's not the cream sauce I want. Except maybe just one more bite. Okay. Now I'm done. Just. Do they have toothpicks? Okay. I'm sayin-- let me sway to the music here. Get into it. Really. Okay: I wanna have fun. You know, babe? I wanna... Wang Chung. Let's slip off to that wine grotto... for a little Kung Pao...Biatch.

Okay. I think I get it now.

Update

Happy Birthday Alicia
(See comment below)

Hmmm...

I got a gazillion hits on this blog the other day when I talked about Tom Brady jetting off to Costa Rica with his GF Gisele. Now the Boston Herald's Inside Track is talking about it again, with dozens of comments from readers who claim that Gisele and Tom are just way too cool to spend time with Brady's son and change poopy diapers, so they're escaping to someplace warm. I'm thinking they're escaping those commenters... There is some serious fascination with The Tom, people either idolize or REALLY HATE him, with the "issue" of his being an absentee Dad the main excuse for the vitriol. It's kind of humorous. I predict there will be congressional hearings about it soon.

And, Mr. Brady, when you were fondling the supermodel in Costa Rica, were you thinking about your son?

Wait. I guess that's a bad question. Let me rephrase...



Yeah, I watched the Roger Clemens hearing yesterday. Is the Rocket lying? Maybe. Maybe not. But his accuser definitely has lied, on several occasions, by his own admission. And we're trying to get Roger on drug use-- drug use so long ago that he can't be prosecuted anymore. Oh wait, we're not trying to get Roger on drug use, we're trying to get Roger on lying about drug use.

So we're listening to McNamee-- a guy who has admitted to lying about drugs-- and we're talking about giving him immunity for lying about drugs, so we can go after Roger... for lying about drugs.

Is this the same congressional body who refuses to consider impeachment because it would be a "distraction?"

Wait... "distraction..." Didn't our Prez used to be a baseball owner? Oh, yeah... A reporter yesterday quoted an unnamed "source on the Hill" as saying the president wants cleaning up major league baseball to be part of his legacy. Mmm-hmmm. I wonder what was going on at the White House yesterday while all of the cable news networks had their cameras trained on Roger?

Update: Tom Brady is NOT a moron

Okay, I saw the video below this morning, of Tom Brady's ex-GF and mama of his baby, and she is so wonderful and engaging, I thought, boy, Tom is a moron. It wasn't a really well-formed and thought-out opinion. It was just one of those passing things. And I wrote some nonsensical and not-nice stuff about Tom and his current girlfriend. I was just spouting off to the 8 or so friends that normally read my blog, people who know enough not to pay any attention to me and my psychotic rantings, so I barely gave it another thought.

The problem: I recently installed one of those statistics counters on my website, so I now can see how many people visit in a day, and how many of them are new, and how many of them are repeaters. Eeek! 27 new people so far today, along with the 8 regulars. Twenty-seven people saw me call Tom's current girlfriend a hungry, man-eating robot, whose attempt at munching on his foot caused his current limp. That was wrong. And very bad. (Not to mention inaccurate!) So I'd like to speak to the twenty-seven new visitors, if you all would only come back for a moment:

Tom Brady's not a moron. He's a highly successful athlete, and as a fan and a human being, I am ashamed. His current GF looks lovely-- I can't say anything beyond that, because I've only ever seen her picture. She pouts a lot, I know, but then if you look at most women's magazines, it seems you're SUPPOSED to pout when you're wearing lingerie. It's like a rule. I'm sure she's wonderful and well-fed, and they're a lovely couple.

That being said, his ex is still adorable and I like this video.

PS I'll either start watching what I say-- and stop just posting random, from the hip, formed-at-the-water-cooler opinions, or I'll close this blog and make it only accessible to a few savvy and forgiving friends. But I'll try not to be mean to good old Tom anymore.