Grandma always said, "Why buy the cow..."

Poor Ashley Dupre. She got million-dollar offers to appear in men's magazines, but -doh- at least one offer rescinded. It seems they've already got all the footage they need:

According to a "Girls Gone Wild" press release, Dupre visited Miami in 2003 to celebrate her 18th birthday. After fighting with a friend and getting thrown out of her hotel, Dupre found a nearby "Girls Gone Wild" bus, the company said.

She signed legal papers and spent a full week on the bus, filming seven full-length tapes which included nudity and same-sex encounters, according to the company.

AP Story "Spitzer Call Girl Already Gone Wild."

I still think the story-behind-the-story is the GENIUS of internet marketing. Truly. Ashley's getting a little, um, over-exposed now, but let us not forget that the Guv of NY paid a thousand smackers an hour for "Kristen." D'ya think he'd pay that for some chick who did a girl-on-girl action video on a bus in Miami? Ummmmmm. Probably not. He paid a grand an hour for "Kristen"-- the world-traveling swimsuit model, temporarily stranded on an island of skyscrapers, needing someone to accompany her in "civilized pursuits..." fine dining... excellent wines. Oh, and very high heels. In his mind, she's a future Vogue Managing Editor. She's the next Gi Bunchabones. She's Summa Cum Laude at Vassar, modeling for book money while she finishes her thesis entitled, "Bald Men: Virility, Sensuality, Power." (At the very least, she speaks French, no?)

Mais non. Less Grace Kelly, more Amy Winehouse-- a wonderful, flawed mess like the rest of us. You can call it false advertising or brilliant marketing. Like George W, I like to call it "the Internets."




(Hmm.. maybe she DOES know French.)

Photo from Us magazine "Portrait of a Prostitute Slideshow."

Jumpin' on the Spitz-vagon

Oh be quiet. You would, too, if you had a blog!



And there are suddenly many parodies of this song, but this is my current fave, because who can resist a lumpy guy with an accordion?

I'm Sick of Eliot! (but I had to see this Kristen)

First Class Amtrak fare round trip NYC to DC.......................................................$398.00
Suite at the Mayflower Hotel (priced on Marriott.com-- 1 King bed suite).......$569.00
Monkey love with with a 5'5", 34C-23-34 swimsuit model who appreciates "refinements"...$1500 per hour + your political career + your dignity (+ that of your family)


Is this the wrong time to talk about legalizing this activity? Wouldn't legalizing and regulating this clean it up and make it safer for everyone? I'm not saying you have to put it on billboards-- but wouldn't it empower the women involved at the very least and make it so that they are not at the mercy of cops and drug-dealing organized crime?

As a society we are pretty messed up in this area. Zee French are how you say, giggling into zeir croissants, aujourd'hui. Silly Americans weeeth your sweeemsuit tops on and your sex scandals. We fart in your general direction.